Proud

By definition,
Proud:
1: feeling or showing pride: as a : having or displaying excessive self-esteem b : much pleased : exultant c : having proper self-respect

2a : marked by stateliness : magnificent b : giving reason for pride : glorious < the proudest moment in her life
 
When you close your eyes and thoughts flood your mind right before you slip into lucid dreams, what do you define yourself upon? What skates across your cerebral cortex and indicates a state of euphoria throughout your body? What makes you proud?
I find myself stuck on this word proud, for it has two seperate meanings, both being polar opposites. One as being the one above, where you're proud of the good work you've done, you're proud of your kids, you're proud of your lover; you want the world to know these things. And the other definition is better enacted as a verb, someone who is too proud to say exactly what they are feeling, someone who is far too proud to involve themselves in certain behaviors, situations, or activities. Although many think of pride as an uplifting ever evolving sort of thing, one that they can only express through words of love to their kids, lovers, friends, and whomever else will listen; we often mis-step the dual meaning, so just for a brain teaser for the day think of this: What if someone who is proud of you, is too proud to be verbally proud of you? Chew on that reality. And by reality I mean the three people that maybe read this.
Being proud isn't about being stubborn and pig headed, being proud is about sacrificing (for the greater good) a little bit of yourself, for that person that you would move the Earth for. Being proud means to tell people about your greatest achievements while remaining humble; informing others to be inspiration, not dwelling on your accomplishments "only if you have to".
Noting on the question I stated above, my answer is this: being proud is about loving someone as much as you love yourself. If you love yourself enough to run after it out a coffee shop door onto the busy streets of MPLS, well then you'd better stop reading this and get a move on. If you love yourself enough to want to tell the world about it, then whomever else you're proud of, you share with people about too. Being proud of someone as a verb has no room for being too proud to do that.
While I falter into a deep sleep at night the proudest moments flutter across my mind, and of course there are thousands of things I am eternally grateful for and proud of, the ones that are recurring are these: My health, my wealth, my happiness. I'm healthier than most, wealthier than most (in love), and happy beyond measure becaues I wake up every morning and make a concious effort to guide my day in the direction of just that. I'm proud of the work I do, and my minor achievements, I'm proud of the fact that I'm going to be finishing my degree (finally) and in the meantime am going to be working and (hopefully) buying a house. I'm proud of my mother, although she has faced adversity her whole life tomorrow she will be walking across the stage at O'shaughnessy auditorium to receive her Master's degree after many years of hard work and not enough years of recognition. I'm proud of my perserverance and strong will. I'm proud of the words I write, and the ideas I form into concepts that make way towards reality. I'm proud of the man in my life, the person who I wake up in the morning thinking about and right before my brain hits the snooze button on life and starts the R.E.M cycle I can't get out of my head. I'm proud of his greatest achievements and the things that make him, well him. He makes me smile when all I want to do is cry, brings reason into my life when I just want to lash out, and listens to me (although sometimes doesn't hear) and does his best to offer advice for any situation I may have, I'm proud to hold his hand in public and proud for people to know I'm his, and thusly =) he is mine. I'm proud of my ford focus, yes that may be a stupid thing to be proud of but I never thought I'd pay a car payment let alone buy a car of my own before the age of 24. I'm proud of my small 400 sq ft. of an apartment, its not much but its the shining glory I get out of all the hard work I put into my life. And finally I'm proud of my friends and family for they have shaped and molded me into someone, I can only hope, is a little bit like a piece of each of them. They are wonderful people to have in my life and although we may not always see eye to eye they stick with me and hear me out, they accept me, and then they support unhealthy eating habits with me =).
 
- The link below is something i 'stumbledupon' and just looking at these pictures not only has me enamored at these two loving souls but it can't help but make me feel like its a fairytale and anyone who is proud of someone looks a little something like this. Enjoy.

http://www.stumbleupon.com/su/6PGXoV/www.weddingchicks.com/wedding-chicks/engagement-sessions/37401/disney-pixars-up-engagement-shoot/